Sunday’s NY TIMES magazine cover story explores the possibility that obesity may be caused, in part, by viruses passed from one person to another. Well, that would explain all the fat cats in Washington. But really, shouldn’t all those friends of Jack Abramoff be looking a bit leaner these days now that the era of free filet mignon is over at his steakhouse, Signatures?

Abramoff’s history of trading meat for favors goes back further than you might think; his first political scandal dates back to elementary school, where he was disqualified from a run for student body president after he was caught trying to get around the school’s limits on campaign spending by bribing his classmates with hot dogs.

Politicians and pork, the eternal equation. Would we have less corruption in DC if we elected more vegetarians?